The blackboard looks like a fractal. Only by peering close can you see that the nested lines are equations and links. But your way is blocked by multicoloured threads extending from tacks punched into the board through sheer strength of righteousness, reaching across a room wallpapered in pictures of videogame women in armour crafted along the exact contours between 18 and AO certification.

Weaving through the web, the brave and sweaty hero homes in on the lower-right quadrant of the chalked equations, stabbing at a knot of logical interconnections.

“See!” he cries. “The person pointing out sexism didn’t account for the second scene of Episode 17, part 3, of Tit-Murderers Cock Squad! Therefore their findings are incorrect!”

The sheer force of the proof blasts from the board as pure light, a shockwave of energy echoing across the world to erase all accusations of sexism. He is awarded the Nobel Prize, which has been remoulded with double D tits for the occasion.