Neutrino Cannon

Doctor Mac Simmum stood over the ruined command console of his Mad Observatory, watching explosions rocking the Mad dome, Mad grad students running for the exits as shrapnel and roaring flames finally created working conditions even they could not endure. Through the chaos he saw the dashing figure who had dared defy his plans. Ireland’s top secret agent, inexplicably betuxed and even now sprinting straight at him.

Mac Simmum hefted the neutrino cannon to his shoulder and fired. Lorcan Lode was hit right through the heart, and was absolutely unaffected, and arrested Mac Simmum, and several centuries later the astrophysiblobs of Kepler 87b got the research paper of their lives.


More stories

Advertisements

The Telegraph Attempts to Return to When their Name Was Relevant

Source: Telegraph

Source: Telegraph

  • Father of two walks on the moon
  • FATHER OF TWO DEFEATS FATHER OF ONE
  • Father of two kills Kennedy
  • Father of three writes Hamlet
  • Some guy who doesn’t even have any kids crucified or something.

Telegraph, the only time a headline should start with “Mother of three” is if those three are flying on their gigantic wings to melt The Wall and destroy Westeros.


More media reactions: